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The issue is one of social context – the rules that govern what is and isn’t appropriate behavior change depending on where you are, the time of day and the generally accepted goal of the venue and event.In bars and clubs, the context is that it’s a space where people come to meet strangers, drink, dance and possibly hook up.At, say, an anime club or a Meet Up for people who love stand-up paddle-boarding, there is , not finding someone to come test the durability of your mattress springs that night.The expected and appropriate behavior is entirely different.

Speaking of social context, if you want to actually date someone from one of your social groups, then you need to actually designed for singles to meet up, most of the members aren’t going to appreciate new members who show up and immediately start chatting up the ladies.Now, I’ve long recommended a number of social events as places to meet women outside of bars and clubs…but it doesn’t do any good if your approach drives people The first mistake that I see people make when they’re trying to meet awesome single people outside of the bar and club scene is that they behave like they’re still at a singles bar.These guys are demonstrating that they have no respect for the group or its members. At their worst, they’re disruptive and ruin the vibe of the group and drive people away.Even groups based around relationships and sexual activities – like poly social groups and BDSM munches – have issues with people who assume that it’s the perfect place to find a hook-up instead of just hobnobbing with like-minded folks.

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