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Sadly, the relationship ended up causing her much more pain than it was worth. “It’s easy to fall in love with narcissists,” said Darlene Lancer, marriage and family therapist.
“They’re seen as charming, confident, open, and entertaining.
Willingly, she contended with his demands, judgements, and self-centeredness.
She let Bill act anyway he wanted, and she dared not say a word about it.
He chastised her for not appreciating his specialness. Unfortunately, she had more power than she thought, but failed to use it.“Me” First—Always “Narcissists put themselves first, and their partners concur,” Lancer said. Then, she realized through the help of a friend that it was possible to break away from Bill, and recapture her self-worth and dignity. But armed with a good support system and a therapist with expertise in treating codependency, Sally had a chance.“Both agree that the narcissist is great and that his or her mate isn’t and should sacrifice! Sally was codependent, meaning she needed Bill to feel okay about herself.Their alluring performance is designed to win trust and love.” However, once you’re hooked, narcissists lack the motivation to maintain a façade and soon become disappointed in their partner.Their criticisms escalate, Lancer said, and they may act distant and dismissive.